at sea

a cruise:

The practice of loading up an enormous floating replica of Las Vegas with a bunch of fearful Americans and whipping them past a dozen tourist-oriented ports of call at thirty knots. (Michael Chabon, Wonder Boys)

true.

although i enjoyed my one cruise immensely, it was exhausting trying to escape the throngs of shipmates to find a secluded spot to enjoy a Greek afternoon, just to turn around and sprint back to the boat before sunset. i believe that on a truly luxurious vacation, one shouldn't have to wear a watch.

on our one cruise, two of my favorite words were "at sea." this simply meant that we could sleep late, eat lots, lounge by the pool, and not worry about Heraklion's shitty museum or getting the Pharaoh's curse in an Alexandrian alleyway.

another Corona with lime, please, waiter.

if i played up the adventurer in me too much in the last post, i would like to apologize. for every yin there is a yang. and after five days of navigating the backwoods of Transylvania, we were ready for seven days of sunscreen on the shores of the Red Sea.

hello, Hurghada.

although "five-star" in Egypt is more like "4.5 star" in America, it was still FOUR.POINT.FIVE.STAR! marble, a/c, cold beer, all-you-can-eat, sun loungers, palm trees, and so much luscious green-grass sod in the middle of a Saharan landscape, that it made Las Vegas look eco-friendly. the hotel even sort of looked like a huge boat.

ahhhh....decadence.

here's what we did:

• apply sunscreen
• eat
• sunbathe (three days), scuba dive (three days)
• read book
• eat
• float the lazy river (our pool had a LAZY RIVER)
• drink
• eat
• drink
• sleep

talk about well-rested.

today begins day 1 of "Operation Move to America."

as they say, the party's (nearly) over.