she is a part of her

there were nights when M was still waking up to nurse every three or four hours and i would have her in my arms, her baby head resting on my arm - back to sleep almost as quickly as she woke up. as much as i love sleep, i did love our alone nights.

looking down at her fine, just-growing-in hair reminded me of Grandma Hunt's short crop haircut.

at the end of her life, with Alzheimer's having taken the actual her from us years prior, Grandma had same little boy haircut, mostly because it was the easiest way to keep it since she couldn't take care of it. but she also had this little boy haircut because she was an innocent child.

sometimes M reminds me of Grandma when she turns her head a certain way or makes a specific little gesture.

i didn't expect this.