the curious case of who-gives-a-shit

for some reason a person can be watching a reasonable dramatic television show here, and it will followed by something so stupid that one considers gouging out the eyes to ensure that she may never watch TV again. if it is possible that the telly can make a person dumber, then i am officially dumber for having watched (accidentally and with morbid fascination) a reality show about a B-actress who is "alive with large breasts." if you haven't guessed, the show is Denise Richards' show, and the plot line of the episode that i watched featured a recap of her promotional tour in New York where she was promoting the show i was currently watching. it was sort of like watching an episode of "How It's Made" about how "How It's Made" is made.

Poor Denise was being asked by various journalists about the plot of the show, which is apparently her life as a large-breasted, B-actress, self-promoting, divorcee, single parent, but subsequently being upset because they were asking her about her life as a large-breasted, B-actress, self-promoting, divorcee single parent. It sorta went like:

Journalist: "So, what's the show about."
Denise: "My life as a single mom. I am just like everybody else."
J: "So your kids are on the show?"
D: "Yes, they are a huge part of my life."
J: "Sorta controversial, little girls being exploited for E! Entertainment Television?"
D: "I don't want to talk about my kids."
J: "But aren't they on the show?"
D: "Yes, they are a huge part of my life. But I'm not here to talk about my kids, I'm here to talk about the show."
J: "Which is about....?"
D: "My life as a single mom. I am just like everybody else."
J: "And your kids are a part of your life, so they are then, de facto a part of the show?"
D: "Well, yes, but....I don't want to talk about my kids, I want to talk about the show."
J: "But your kids are on the show. So we are talking about the show."
D: "Why are you being so mean to me? I just want to talk about the show, not my kids."
J: "So the show. Who is on it?"
D: "Me. My kids."
J: *Shoots self in face*

and it's not just Denise. apparently there is another show entirely dedicated to following a group breast-implanted blondes and surfer boys who work in an L.A. tanning salon.

Salon Worker 1: "Hi, welcome to this tanning salon. Would you like a tan?"
Customer: "Yes, I am sickeningly wealthy and somewhat out of touch with reality, but I must look orange today."
Salon Worker 2: "OK. That will be $358."
Customer: "Wow, at that rate, I'd like one for my pet, too."
SW2 to SW1: "Let's have sex with each other now."

why is this happening? isn't there a game show where people must fit through holes to win money?

and it's not just television, either. i saw the movie Seven Pounds. once you figure out in the first 20 minutes what the hell Will Smith is trying to accomplish with his oppressive guilt and many, many painful camera close-ups, you just want him to make a decision. yes or no. it could have been an episode of scrubs and i would probably have enjoyed it much more.

and that brings me to benjamin button. i actually aged a year during that film. and brad pitt is only extremely hot for 20 minutes of the two-hour extravaganza. he is also slightly retarded. and there is no character development. it is like he's old, then he's aging backward, then he's still aging backward, then, yes, he's a little younger yet, and then he is really young, and wow! everyone else is aging normal, what a juxtaposition. and then he is more young. and let's make some obvious comment about how old folks are childlike, and still more young. he is in love. they are not aging in the same direction, an obvious problem. and then more reverse and regular aging. and then it is over with the even more obvious "when we get really old we die" ending. holy crap. phenomenal. can i please have a refund?

i am going to go back to my standards: comedy, 'splosions, and "The Girls Next Door."